The internally displaced; our own refugee crisis, right here in Los Angeles. Pisces, Shay and Amy bide their time on a city sidewalk in North Hills, CA.

The internally displaced; our own refugee crisis, right here in Los Angeles. Pisces, Shay and Amy bide their time on a city sidewalk in North Hills, CA.

“We don’t believe you, ‘cause we’re the people …”

I feel free

Poem written by Ashley Grant, for an assignment in a documentary photojournalism class at California State University, Northridge, 2014.

 

Here I sit beside you

With dirty palms and withered clothes.

This bench that we both share is small,

For that I am sorry.

I have no where else to reside, but here.

Or beneath the freeway across town.

I am homeless, yes that’s true

But you should respect me, as I will respect you.

I was wealthy once before.

College educated and happily married

I thought I had the world all figured out.

But life hits you hard

And you can be thrown off your path.

Before I knew it, 30 years at a large company

Had disappeared and I was pushed to the side.

No warning, no back up plan.

There were no drugs or alcohol to blame

I just was a simple man trying to survive.

Bills soon consumed me and

My wife and I began to fight almost every second of the day.

Life was almost unbearable.

I was in a constant uphill battle with myself.

Although I had all the qualifications, jobs were scarce.

With no money coming in I knew my life would further change.

My home was taken by the IRS and my wife soon left me after.

She needed more she said.

I wanted that for her.

With nothing to hold onto

I allowed myself to be taken by the streets.

Six years have come and gone,

And I sit beside you now.

Money is a hell of a thing.

It can allow you to have it all

or in the end leave you high and dry.

I am homeless, yes that’s true.

But I am alive and although I now have nothing,

Only that cart across the way.

Somehow I feel like I’m better off that way.

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Skin

On Broadway Street, the heart of old Los Angeles. We recognized each other, and Ivy was pleased to find that I remembered the rabbit she kept tucked in her shirt when we had crossed paths back in March. Her speech today was not quite as impaired by substance as it had been that day, and she related that Raymond Yellowhawk had died, and pointed out that in fact, his prosthetic leg was now on display on a shelf in the store across the street, the very store where they had been sitting on the sidewalk that day in March. There was a little more conversation about sleeping conditions, prison tattoos, and we waved goodbye… 

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“What I’m trying to describe is that it’s impossible to get out of your skin into somebody else’s…. That somebody else’s tragedy is not the same as your own.”
                                                                                ― Diane Arbus

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Relating these encounters anecdotally risks contextualizing the lives of Ivy and others as just “stories” leaving one with the sinking feeling that they carry semiotic and emotive pinpricks to the conscience not unlike those in fairy tales, anthropology and possibly religion (sure to be a debatable point, that last one). 

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There are enough pictures already, enough tales of suffering and despair, so that long ago if they were to be effective enough to make a bigger difference, society would have had to have been thoroughly shamed into whatever means necessary. But no, so more photographs are on the way regardless; even while I struggle with my own concerns about exploiting the drama of their circumstances, I hope the public sees it not as decorative art or entertainment. 

In Plain Sight

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Excerpts from interview with Linda, Terry and Amy, three members of a community of experienced homeless survivors that occupy public space along the sidewalk and on the freeway ramps of the 405 at Nordhoff in North Hills. We sat at a local fast food restaurant that serves as a focal point in their lives.


Can you tell me about the situation down here by the 405. Even as we speak there are Caltrans workers there, moving some people around. 

Linda: The situation is, that there are laws that say you can’t sit, sleep, squat, kneel on the sidewalk. On city sidewalks between, I think it’s like 6 am and 9 pm.

Terry: I was told by officers 9pm to 6 am you can be on where you sleep. Only you can’t have anything attached to any of the wires, or fences, or anything else. From 9 to 6 though. I would figure maybe 6 am to 6 pm would be more reasonable, that’s what they do downtown.

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Linda : And also, there’s a law that says you can sleep anywhere you want on the sidewalk, as long as you’re 20 feet from any entry door. That isn’t brought up. That doesn’t even come out of their mouth.

Do the police come and tell you to move all of the time?

Linda: All the time

Terry: Not all the time. No. Well, the law…

Linda: On a regular basis Terry. Come on, think about it.

Terry: Well once a month they do, at least. But the law states that sanitation deals with the city. Caltrans deals with the state property. Anything about or on the freeway onramp is the state property. They have four sections they gotta deal with, with state property. Each section has a corner and that’s all they deal with. They don’t deal with any other corner. Now what there are doing, is they are trying to incorporate Caltrans and sanitation together, to work together. 

Linda:  Oh, they’re doing it.

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Terry: Once you hit city property they take your stuff and throw it in the dumpster, right in front of you. They don’t even give you a chance to move it off and put it somewhere else outside.

Linda: It depends on which CHP officers are there.

Terry: The CHP officers by that point, they wouldn’t do anything, LAPD is responsible for the city, not state. CHP are much more giving and they are much more flexible.

Linda: They have heart.

Terry: They give you privacy. They keep your privacy.

Linda: And they give you a chance to get as much as you can, in a certain amount of time, out. You know.

But they give you warnings when they want you to move?

Linda: Not always. No. They have a new supervisor. Excuse me, but he’s a total a-hole.

Which agency?

Linda: Um, Caltrans. And he’s in charge of supervising the corners.

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Terry: He’s the district manager.

Linda: Yeah, regional manager.

Terry: The supervisor over here is a young boy, young kid, he’s maybe 25 or 30.

Linda: And he’s a dickhead. Excuse me.

Terry: Well, he’s been very informative to me. He told me a lot of stuff that I needed to know. That maybe he shouldn’t have said but he does it…

Linda: ‘Cause he has heart.

Terry: So, I don’t have a problem with that. See, I know now that they’re going to put us in a position now to where Caltrans is gonna kick us off of state property, we’re going to take our stuff and put it on city property, and sanitation is going take it as soon as we put it on city sidewalk. So try to imagine this is state property, I take all my stuff, I go out and put it there, go back get some more, and come back, all of that stuff is going to be in the trash. They are not going to give us a chance.

Linda: And they put it in a trash truck. A smelly, stinky, dirty trash truck. That goes around down the street, empties the blue bins and the black bins, and you know all of the bins that are in front of your house. That’s what they put our stuff in and then they say you have 30 days to go pick it up, by appointment. Get ‘em to answer the phone.

So they took some of your artwork? What happened?

Linda: They took it. They took it all. For two years I’ve been doing my artwork. For two years I’ve been collecting jewelry, so I could open a store. In January, OK, I had two of the counselors from LA Family Housing that were my helpers, that were willing to go and say that I was highly recommended to get this loan. Ok? I was going in January. I was ready for it and sanitation took it all. I mean, took my future. I tried for two years to get up out of here and it’s like now I’m right back where I started. It’s been 15 years, come on, give me a break! (Crying) A person doesn’t try that hard and work as hard as I have, 18 hours a day, seven days a week, to try and get out of here if they didn’t want to get out of here, get out of this situation. They wouldn’t do it. They’d say “Hey screw it!”

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So, they came at night and took it?

Linda: No, during the day. And there was a three-day notice, but I wasn’t in town. And then I had some of my stuff over there and then this police officer comes up to me, and I had five carts sticking out, and he said,  “How many carts are you going to take” and I said “Well, I’m gonna take all of my carts.” And he said, “No you’re not. You’re taking two.” You know? I mean who are you to tell me after everything I’ve done for the last two years, to get out of here? Who are you to put me back at the bottom? By taking everything I own (crying). That was of value that meant anything to me.

Terry: Same thing with me, but they only had me take one cart. Threw six of my carts in the trash.

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Linda: You know I love jewelry. I always will. And I never had… I never really had a lot of jewelry but the things that I collected for my store, I took very few for my own. You know I kept very few, everything was gonna go in the store. And you can ask Terry. Terry seen some of it and it was beautiful. And I got it really cheap and I took advantage of that because I know the prices I know, you know, what it’s value is and what they could have gotten. And they were generous enough to accept what I offered them and they’re homeless too, you know. But, my mom did not raise a quitter and I love my mom. And my mom gave me my values and my standards and my morals and I won’t go back on them. I won’t waiver on them. You know I’m fortunate, I’ve never had to go out and turn a trick, do a date, do any of that. You know, I’ve…I’ve panhandled or I drew the ramp, I recycle and I have people who give to me and I’m very grateful. I’m very appreciative of that. Therefore, when I find things I can’t use and I don’t need, I give to the Our Lady of Peace Catholic church and I don’t even believe in the Catholic religion. Ok? And it’s like you have to give back. You have to keep the circle going, it can’t be broken. That’s what has done all of this. That’s what is dividing this country.

How do people treat you when they see you on the sidewalk under the freeway? Do they yell things at you?

Terry: “Get a job you crusty old man!”

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Linda: Like, three weeks ago, there was… for like an hour, excuse me but, “Fuck the homeless. Fuck the homeless. They ain’t nothing. They ain’t nothing.” And that’s how they feel, we’re worthless, we’re helpless, we’re useless.

Who’s saying those things?

Linda: The neighborhood and the kids. I mean the kids are not taught anything by the parents about respect and all that. And that’s the situation possibly… yeah a lot of them are out here by choice, but I’m not. I lost my job at Denny’s because I didn’t speak Spanish.

When was that?

L: 15 years ago and you know, when you don’t have income… and now at 62 I can’t get a job, because I’m too old. You know? So, I tried… well, you know, somebody said “Linda, you know so much about jewelry, and about stones, and about emeralds, and about metals, when it comes to jewelry. Why don’t you try and open up your own store?” I have a friend, there’s a couple, that are real good friends of mine, and we all recycle and we have all found, beautiful, wonderful, expensive valuable things. And a lot of them aren’t valuable, but they’re beautiful and they’re still able to be sold. So, I was going to open a store and then by chance I just happened to pick up the statue. That went into the trash.

Terry: You can’t keep anything

Linda: Anyway, she was all white when I got her and I happened to just start, you know, messing around with nail polish and painting, and trying to get a little color on her. And people were commenting and saying “Wow that’s beautiful.” You know? And so I decide to paint her dress all black and I built her hat up to make it look like it had a feather on it. There was a lot and the thing that is so hard… I was gonna have my grand opening at night and I was going to auction her off for a shelter for single women. It was gonna go for good.

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Terry: The way that people behave…and all of the name calling, throwing stuff at us, you know all of the stuff that they do, is creating a very hostile, angry place for us to be and not all of us are staying there. Some of us are staying there, we’ll manage our mood and manage our behavior. Some of ‘em aren’t. Some of them if they do it too much they’re going to go postal on them and they will.  They’re just not in their right mind. And down here, to be treated the way I’ve been, the way my wife and I have been, they could push someone over the edge. You’ve been out here long enough to know. What I am saying is, she can sit here and cry and feel like she does. And I’ve seen her depressed and I’ve seen her in the best spirits. 100% difference. And it’s because of the way that people are treating us.

Linda: And the way the city is treating us.

Terry: We’re less than–

Linda: –you know were less than human. You know how there’s a saying that says, you know, “You’re lower than the crap on an ant’s ass.” I mean that’s how I’m starting to feel and why keep trying? (Crying) why keep trying if they are just going to come in and say “No, you can only have this.”

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Terry: The state is supposed to help us. This is supposed to be people that are saying “Hey, we’re going to help you. We’re going to send a cop down here and the cops going to say all this stuff that’s good and positive, and follows up on everything he says he’s gonna.  And then he comes back, another cop telling me this and this and this, and meanwhile, you’ve gotta to take all of your stuff out of your carts and leave it here because the guys here to take your carts. I’ve got ten carts full …

Linda: And then sanitation comes right up behind them and takes it. And then Chacon, Officer Chacon, he’s a really good man. He really is. And we understand that they’re doing their job. But you changed the law to make new rules yourself. He said, “Well, there’s a new rule.” Now if there’s one complaint from one parent that their child has to walk in the street to go around you, they’re calling. Sanitation is there and you’re losing everything.

Terry: And they don’t have to give you a three-day notice. ‘Cause that negates it.

Linda: But the law is, that they have to give us three-day notice. And they just said, “No. There’s a new rule.” That was officer Chacon.

Terry: He’s a very nice, gentle, caring officer.  

Linda: But his watch commander is getting on his butt.

Terry: If any other cop could be like that. We’d get a lot more done. He’s kind. He’s gentle. He’s friendly. He’s considerate about feelings.

Linda: They need to teach cops that they’re not machines. They still have to have heart. They still could be human and it would help more if they would be more human and teach them under these circumstances work with them. I mean how would they feel if we went in their three-bedroom house, that they’re making their payments for and say, “No, you can’t live here, you have to move into a one bedroom apartment and the only thing you can take is your clothes.” What would they feel?

Terry: I asked the cop that when he took my stuff. What would you think if you had to tell your wife all of her clothes are gone. Bet you wouldn’t like it is what I said. She would be devastated. She would be torn up inside. All her jewelry, all her personal belongings, all her hygiene products.

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Linda: All of her photographs.

Terry: You gotta try and imagine that these women out here on the street, work hard to get all their hygiene products together, all their personal stuff. It’s important to them more than it is to guys. I can smell like a goat for a week. It takes a lot of doing to get all those hundred things, the makeup, the perfumes, the sanitation stuff and all of the soaps, creams, and all of the stuff. I mean we’re talking about a fucking shopping cart full of crap and if one of the things are missing, they’re gonna know. My wife does. If one little teeny jar of something, if it’s gone she knows.

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What about the housing situation? Any prospects for getting out of this situation?

Terry: There are no prospects whatsoever. There’s a couple things that we need to do.

Linda: If you’re homeless you can’t even get a job because you don’t have an address.

Terry: It’s kind of like this… If I go to work for example. I went to work and I worked eight hours a day, everyday, five days a week. It would at least be up to three week before I would get any money. Everyday I have to come up with at least fifteen bucks to survive that day. If I don’t we don’t eat. I didn’t eat yesterday. Why? Because the ramp wasn’t giving me any money. I tried. I was on the ramp for three or four hours throughout the day, I didn’t make enough money. That’s just the way the ramp works. Not always it’s like that, most times it’s not. But you know, I have to provide for my wife, that’s one thing. Two, it’s a competition out here. There’s a lot of competition for the ramp.

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How do you guys divide that up?

Linda: We don’t. It’s each person that gets on the ramp, keeps what they have.


How do you decide who gets on the ramp when?

Terry: Well it’s supposed to be an hour, if you have any sort of decency.

Linda: If someone is waiting it’s an hour.

Terry: As a man I will defer always for a woman, I always do.

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Linda: And the ones that actually live here and are a part of our own little circle and family, you know are first. And the ones that have been here the longest. Ok, like me and Gracie and Leprechaun, we have seniority. But I don’t care about seniority just do your hour and then let me have the ramp and if someone else is waiting and I feel like getting off, I’ll get off. You know, like “here.” If they start giving me money, or I have what I want or what I need.

Terry: I know that they can’t handle more than a half an hour.

Linda: I can’t

Terry: Twenty, thirty minutes they are done.

Linda: Whether we made money or not. It doesn’t matter.

Terry: On the other hand if I see Leprechaun on the ramp, forget it. It’s a fight. I’m talking physical. It’s a fight for the ramp.

Linda: Oh don’t ask. Don’t ask. Don’t get us into Leprechaun.

Terry: He’s the most stubborn person that comes to the ramp. You know, he’s got his reasons, he’s got his let’s say monkeys, but he doesn’t care about anybody but himself.

Linda: It’s that way all of the time.

Amy: He is a nice guy. He has character. He’s fun.

Linda: Yes, he is a nice guy. Oh he’s stupidly funny. Oh my God.

Terry: He won’t give it up and he will get to the point where he will throw clothes at you if you persist.

Linda: Yeah, if he’s been up for a couple of days.

Have you fought with him physically?

Terry: I have almost fought more than once, from getting so angry, because I have to provide for my wife and myself and he provides for his bottle and his whatever … just him.

Where does he sleep?

Linda: He’s back under the road. He’s been with us… he got out of prison three years ago and he’s been over here ‘cause you know, I’m like his best friend. And I love him to death but he … can be physically violent. He’s gotten in my face and I’ve gotten right back in his. That why he doesn’t put a hand on me because he knows. He may be old Leprechaun, but I’m the witch that will take you out.

Terry: Yeah, he’s OK. He’s not a bad person.

Linda: Yeah, he’s got a good heart.

Terry: But when it comes to money he don’t care.

Linda: But that’s the Irish in him. (laughs)

Terry: And that really upsets me because I really do have a responsibility to myself and to her, to get some necessities. And it’s not easy to do. As a matter of fact most of the time we don’t.

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Can you tell me the story you told me the other morning about the Section 8 housing Amy got?

Terry: You know we got through Cornerstone, she got Section 8. And it didn’t take very long, about a month. She wasn’t as stable as she is now. She was a little more scattered and a lot more worried. Very depressed.

Amy: I had gone through a breakdown when we lost the house and when everything was happening, I kind of like lost it. My parents were there and my ex-husband was renting a room. The epicenter of it all was coming at me. And my dad has got this like gambling habit, which is part of the reason why the house got lost.  

To be continued … 

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I got a surprise visit yesterday at my university office. Jean Scarpati, a 70-year-old homeless woman, arrived with her little shopping cart stuffed with small plastic bags, and a large black sack slung over her shoulder ala Santa Claus. After smoothing out a crumpled piece of a page from the recent article on homelessness I had contributed to for the Jewish Journal, she explained that she had travelled by bus and on foot, searching for David Blumenkrantz to discuss her artwork with him. We ended up chatting for around an hour, during which time I found out that she sleeps on a bus stop bench in Encino (Ventura and Woodley); has been homeless for 7 years, since the death of her beloved man; survives on her Social Security income; and that in spite of her bag lady appearance, was sharp-minded, spoke with a classic Queens, NY accent and possessed a subversive sense of humor (just my type).  She dug through her things for a good while until she finally was able to locate a series of printed postcards that featured her artworks, under which she had written philosophical phrases. They were all signed and dated, early 2000s, apparently just before she became homeless and lost her momentum as an artist. Could I, she wondered, help her get these printed on t-shirts, coffee cups, or however might best work to market them? She explained that the originals (acrylic paintings) were in her storage unit somewhere, and could retrieve them if necessary. If anyone is interested in helping Jean and I have products made that can be sold to raise money for her (and she added, for any charity group that participates), please contact me.

#OneOfUs

#OneOfUs

From #OneOfUs, interviews and portraits.